MONTHLY TOEFL ESSAY#1

     Table manner is the first step of a person’s brain development and education. When mothers meet their eyes with their infants, infants communicate with and learn about their mothers. A toddler trains to behave and get etiquette lessons during his meal with elders. A table is a place where child and parents share kinship and converse about their recent lives. Every country has distinct table cultures and the daily usage of table emphasizes the importance. Especially, Korean tables are distinct because Koreans use a tool called chopsticks. This custom, using chopsticks during meal is really a merit to Koreans. Majority of researches prove that chopstick using facilitates development of brain. Also, chopstick allows many Korean families to spend longer time during their meals. Other countries would also benefit when adopting this custom.

To begin with, chopstick using table manners promote development of brain. Utilizing chopstick requires thirty parts of body joints and over sixty parts of body muscles. Especially, when used for picking up small things, the activity stimulates nervous system reaches the zenith.   For foreigners, chopstick for every day diet, would enable them to enhance their usage of brain and concentration. Some critics assert that the success of Korea’s supreme semiconductor technology is contributed by the custom of using chopsticks. Semiconductor technology requires delicate touch and meticulous observation. Since Korean mechanics are from environment which consumes many parts of muscles, used to deal with small objects and have good concentration, korea takes advantage of rapid development of semiconductor. This example is the representative one that shows the superiority of traditional custom, chopsticks. Other countries might also benefit by utilizing chopsticks and exercising their brain activities. Cutting edge including IT, medical treatment, usually needs delicate touch so other country or foreign people can benefit.

Furthermore, the table manner using chopsticks ensure families to spend enough time bonding together. Unlike forks or other utilities, chopsticks can pick up only a limited amount of food. With chopsticks, people slowly reach the food for many times. In comparison to forks, which can pick up chunk of food, chopstick using is more time consuming relatively. As a result, people could enjoy more time with their family by using chopsticks. In majority of countries, many social problems such as murder, violence, divorce emerged by the deficiency of understanding and affection with family members. Private time with family is crucial these days since kinship with family members helps people to grow upright. People communicate about recent hardships they are facing or their daily schedules with family during meal. People release their burden or stress when they are with family members and can endure their stressful daily lives. Chopsticks allow people to spend adequate amount of time with their family and share affection and understanding with each other when they are in the table. Chopstick using helps families to enjoy adequate time releasing their stress and feeling the love between each member.

To sum up, one of the traditional table custom, chopstick using is helpful for foreign people. Adjusting the custom to their country or their lifestyle would really benefit because of the merits of chopstick using. It is very educational, since it encourages the usage of brain. It improves concentration and muscle controlling of a person. Furthermore, it enables people to have enough conversation with their family members. Chopstick takes relatively longer time for finishing the meal, and people spend the time with affection and care with their family during the meal. 

personal narrative revision

Memories With My Pets

     In this modern society, pets fill up people's lonely heart with love and care. I had my own pets twice in my life. I only had two pets due to our family's health problem As I was younger, I suffered from asthma and my brother had a serious allergy to all kinds of objects such as pollen, fur, dust and sun. My parents wouldn't let us raise pets, considering that we would be exposed to furs and fleas which might worsen our condition. However, it's every child's wish to own a pet. Thus I was a little lonely since my brother was a teenage boy when I was five years old. So, my parents allowed pets that would not hinder the sanitary environment. It is heartbreaking that all the pets I desired for faced a tragic death.

     My first pet was a tadpole. I bought it in a nearby pet ship with my allowance. The creature was small in size but huge enough to fulfill my monotonous daily life with vivacious experiences and lessons. The tadpole was initially just a tadpole but as time passed, it grew two legs, two more legs, and a long tail which almost resembled a mature frog. Watching its growth astonished me and helped me understood the nature of life. Raising one life by myself was meaningful and gave rich experience to me. However, happiness did not ever last because I accidentally flushed my tadpole away into a drain when I was playing with it. Death of something I loved was a real tragedy.

     The next and the final pet I had was a rabbit. I raised a rabbit in the terrace. Rabbit had big ears, deep blue eyes, and vivid, cotton like fur. I gave all my care and love as if I treated my own sibling. The rabbit served not only as a friend, but it was something I truly cared for without any expectations or compensations. Also, I could gain good qualities such as responsibility by feeding and cleaning it. I believed that I could maintain happy memories with my pet forever. However, the rabbit also encountered a tragic death. I wonder whether innocence or excessive love killed the rabbit. There was abundant clovers growing int he park. Clover means 'Rabbit grass' when interpreted in Korean, so I though it would be the best food source for my pet. As a result, I picked up all the clovers and fed my rabbit. The next day, it suffered diarrhea and later died. 

     All the things I truly desired became reality. However, all my wishes left some flaws and tragedy. Memories with my pets are not that pleasant personally. It made wounds in my youth. Despite the tragic incidents, the short memories are valuable since I learned a lot and had distinct experiences. 

my goal

Writing is a difficult subject to me. My TOEFL writing score is the lowest compared to other sections. The biggest reason is that I do not have any chances to convey my ideas with letters except English class. Furthermore, writing is not really my interest and I have some bad memories. Memories of writing class of first semester is horrible since my essay editting job was done always at midnight, pressed for time, nervous. I do not want a repertoire of the first semester. As I know my deficiency, I could improve a lot. It would be a difficult process but once I overcome my deficiency, the subject will be much easier and interesting.

The primary thing teachers commented about my essay was that I should develop more. I could not understand about "developing". I used quite good examples and made some points about the topic. However, in KMLA, by reading some famous stories and well-organized essays, I could realize my deficiency. My sentences had some ideas, but it only ended to an idea. My essays were choppy, it was a list of ideas that didn't link together. Also, the ideas weren't specific, neither the examples. I used broad sentences that conveys diverse meanings which hindered the fluency of the essay. These are all the things I want to eliminate by taking composition class.

introduction

Hi! My name is Soo young Choi. You can call me Isabel:)
Actually, it's my Spanish name. The second semester of KMLA makes me exciting and somewhat anxious. The past two days of new semester was exhausting because life in KMLA means little sleep. I think I just need some time to adapt to new daily schedules.

 I enjoy watching any kind of movies. I especially like sensational ones such as action or thriller. The most recent movie I watched is the "Dark Knight Rises". Watching movies is a essential because it is the best way I can realease my stress. T.T It is really stressful being a highschool student in Korea and watching movies help me find my innerpeace. (HAHA)

I am in the field of natural science. I am especially interested in biology and chemistry. Biochemistry catches my interest recently. I want to study in depth about biochemistry and conduct researches about developing a new drug or material. Even though jobs related to this field is regarded difficult, it is meaningful. I want to develop something that would benefit other people.

From this semester, I wish I could get better grades from overall subjects. I especially want to enhance my writing skills and read books of diverse fields.
Well, this is a really short "introduction" and I hope that I could get good results from a good start!